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January 25, 2025Being a mother is not an easy job. There are degrees to which others can offer support or circumstances where resources might be available to lighten a mother’s load, though that’s not the case for everyone. A confluence of unfortunate factors can make things exponentially more burdensome, and it may ultimately become too much. Mary Bronstein’s If I Had Legs I’d Kick You finds one woman at her wit’s end, barely hanging on but determined to remain afloat for the sake of her daughter as she drowns further into isolated misery every day.
Linda (Rose Byrne) is having a rough time. Her young daughter has a feeding tube but isn’t eating enough to make the target weight to have it removed. When Linda comes home to her apartment, what begins as water pooling at her daughter’s feet in the bathroom quickly escalates to a giant hole in the ceiling, forcing them to relocate to a motel where the overwhelmed Linda frequently leaves her daughter sleeping by herself at night. Her husband is away on a long-term work assignment and is the opposite of encouraging in their brief phone calls, and Linda is still working as a therapist seeing patients as she struggles to maintain appropriate boundaries with her own therapist (Conan O’Brien), whose office is just down the hall from hers.
It’s almost impossible to watch this film as a fan of Byrne’s without thinking back to her most recent TV role in the Apple TV+ series Physical. The camera spent so much time close up on her face throughout that series, and it once again occupies the majority of the frame for most of this movie. The result is different, however, since Linda is not nearly as expressive, and when she is, it’s usually to channel anger at whoever might be in her orbit (most of them do deserve it). And while Linda doesn’t have an unhealthy relationship with food like Sheila did on Physical, she does stuff an entire slice of cheeseless pizza in her mouth at the beginning of the film, indicating a resigned mentality to the fact that she doesn’t have any control over her life.
This film manages to capture the demands of motherhood and the crippling nature of feeling as if you’re in it all on your own. When Linda’s husband mentions that he’s at a sports game and she notes how nice it must be to have free time, he belittles her work, diminishing it to sitting around and listening to people complain all day. Though Linda is unquestionably making bad decisions at nearly every turn, she’s had to do so much for her daughter without anyone properly appreciating or supporting her. She’s at her breaking point but has to push past it since she has no other option.
In her second feature film, Bronstein, who also appears in the cast as the doctor treating Linda’s daughter and consistently pushing Linda to come in to talk about her treatment plan, has crafted something that leans into its imaginative side, which is intriguing but not always effective. There’s plenty to ponder regarding the gaping hole in the apartment ceiling that could certainly represent a number of things, and there are other moments in which the narrative gives way to something more contemplative. It feels in those moments like a dream, untethered to reality and serving as an all-too-fleeting escape from everything Linda has to do. It does succeed well in its standard storytelling, making those diversions less worthwhile and appealing. Choosing not to show either of Linda’s immediate family members but just to hear their voices smartly keeps the focus on Linda, even if it is somewhat disorienting, making it impossible to look away from what she’s experiencing.
As Linda, Byrne is phenomenal, tapping into the utter exhaustion she feels and just doesn’t have time to show. Her performance feels more than lived in, and it’s extraordinary – and sometimes terrifying – to watch her when she finally tries to take back control of her life in whatever small way she can. O’Brien, while perhaps an unconventional choice for this mostly dramatic role, is a perfect foil for Byrne in their shared scenes, emoting little but still managing to convey a specific attitude in response to the mess she throws at him. A$AP Rocky and Danielle Macdonald are also memorable as two people who connect in different ways with Linda and leave an impression on her. As a tribute to hard-working, under-appreciated mothers everywhere and as a powerhouse showcase for Byrne, this film, which can be challenging and draining, is definitely a success.
Movie Rating: 7/10